EA Games - It's in the game manual, which you can't have

I recently picked up Dante's Inferno for my 360.  I'd played the demo when it first came out, enjoyed it, but held off on buying the game in hopes of a GOTY version.  Since it didn't appear that was happening, I figured that buying it on clearance at Target this past week would be fine.

Now, one thing that I love to do with a new game is sit down with the game manual.  I like to read about the story that precedes the game and leads up to what happens when you first push start.  I like to see what the controls are, get the details of various power-ups, just really get into the nitty gritty of the game itself.  And with a game like Dante's Inferno, there was a lot of that.  Where I thought I was going to be able to read about this and get a good idea about what was necessary, instead I found a 4 page pamphlet inside the game case.  Each page was in a different language, stating the equivalent of the following:

"Electronic Arts has chosen to go green, and in order to do so, we've decided that we won't be printing game manuals for any of our product.  If you would like to view the manual for this game, please go to http://support.ea.com/app/manuals and view the manual there."

I'd like to give you a few minutes to go ahead and click on that link.  Go ahead.  I'll wait.  And I want you to find the manual for Dante's Inferno.

Can't find it, can you?

That's because it's not there.  That's a bit frustrating, isn't it?

As a frustrated and confused customer, I chose to go ahead and contact their support.  Since it was after 9PM CST, phone options were no longer available, but they did have chat.  I made use of that.  After a 14 minute wait, here's what I got (which is edited since their chat system doesn't like apostrophes or other random characters):

you: Good evening.
Atin: Thanks for contacting EA Help! My name is Atin how may I help you?
Atin: Good Morning
you: Just purchased Dante's Inferno for the Xbox *****.
you: Opened it up, no manual.
you: Says inside that I can download the manual from the EA site
you: There is no manual for Dante's Inferno on EA's site.
Atin: I'll do my best to address your concern.&#*****;
you: Soooooo, how are we going to fix this? :)
Atin: May I know where did you purchased the game from?
you: Target, brand new.
Atin: Ned, please contact the retailer in this case.
you: No, I don't think that's an option.
you: The slip inside the case is from EA
Atin: Ned,
Atin: I sincerely apologize for any inconvenience but the tool through which we could pull up your Account details is presently not functioning.
Atin: We are expecting this tool to be functional again with in an hour or two. I would appreciate if you could please get back to us after an
Atin: hour or two in order to get better assistance in this matter.
you: If this four- page sheet tells me to access the manual online at http://support.ea.com/app/manuals and it is not available, there is an issue.
you: I'm curious as to how and why my account details are necessary?
you: When I'm just trying to get a link for a manual as advertised within your product.
Atin: I would be able to generate the code once the tool starts working, so it would not be possible to provide you the code as the tool is down.
Atin: I apologize for the inconvenience caused.&#*****;

At this point, I sent myself the above copy of the chat and exited the chat session as it was painfully obvious that I wasn't going to get anywhere.  It was also quite apparent that the technician wasn't even understanding the issue for which I'd contacted them.  I fumed a little, took EA's name in vain, then decided that I'd resume my pursuits the next day.

Since there wasn't a lot going on the next morning at work, I decided to try again.  This time, the phone options were available and I elected to have a representative call me.  The call came through a few minutes after submitting the request.  Thankfully, it was someone that was within the US, preventing me from worrying that I was working against a language barrier.  I explained to this rep the situation, stated that I'd looked on their help site only to find that the manual wasn't available, and had searched elsewhere to see if I could find another copy.  Unfortunately, this call was full of quite a bit of fail, for the following reasons:

1. She asked me if I'd checked their website after I'd already stated I'd checked there.
2. She referred me to get the walkthrough of the game from a third-party site that she'd found by Googling "Dante's Inferno manual."  It's the one from the Supercheats site, if you're curious.
3. The one smart thing she'd suggested was checking on the Xbox Marketplace to see if I could get it there, but the link was dead the last time I'd checked.

Ultimately, EA couldn't help me.  The service that they've provided for their clients has failed.  My issue got closed as "resolved" but I was told that I could respond to a survey that they'd send out.  I've held off on responding to said survey because I don't think calling EA a bunch of cum-guzzling donkey fuckers would get me anywhere nor resolve my issue.

 And if you just want the tl;dr version of this experience, I think it can be summed up as this: If you're going to offer a service, make sure you're fully supporting it.

Goddamnit....

I thought I could be strong.  I thought I could resist.  I was pretty sure it would never happen.



....But it did.



I'm totally buying Skylanders and a few figures for my Xbox tonight.  *sob*

I'll try to have a little something slapped together for it sometime next week with my initial impressions.

6 things that could have made Skyrim better.

The Elder Scrolls 5: Skyrim is a wonderful game, with a scope and scale rivaled by few.  It does however have some things I'd like to see changed.

Part A:  The Annoyances:

6.  An entire land of chatty Kathys.

In Skyrim, every single entity that can talk, does.  I'm all for the myriad of directions the game points you in at once, I'm all for the dialogue web that's woven almost non-stop by the inhabitants of Skyrim, but please, oh please make it something I initiate unless it's directly related to a quest.  There are several cities and areas that you travel through quite extensively and the people there never fail to repeat their codes messages with the spirit of a 5 year old.  Skyrim is 100% extroverted, which if you're introverted like me, you'll realize just how annoying that is.  Also, if you get married (and are married in Real Life) you'll understand that the programmer of the "love" dialogue isn't married.  There were several times I almost murdered my in-game wife for being ridiculous with the "love".  It was a lot easier to stomach once I took the pick-pocket equipped items perk and stripped her down.

5.  Load screen info.

It's cool you can rotate the 3D models on the load screen, it's also cool that you give lore info and more as the game loads, but please don't lie to me.  Bears aren't hostile unless provoked?  I guess walking within 100 yards of their designated areas provokes them, not to mention the fact they can see through every stealth item, skill, and perk in the game to try and claw your face off.    Things also repeat quite frequently based on what you're doing in the game, which is fine, but still annoying.


Part B:  The Irritations

4.  Skill based leveling.....only.

Fantastic idea, leveling your character based on leveling skills, based on how much you use them. An Idea that I initially loved, until I maxed out the skills I wanted to play using and was stuck on level 38.  To finish leveling to 50 (for the trophy and perks) I had to resort to either grinding out levels using skill trees I didn't care for or using some of the strange and silly exploitable skills the game has.

3.  Loading screen zoning woes:

The outside world in Skyrim is, for lack of a better term, GIGANTIC.  This area is one seamless zone and if you were to travel straight from one side to another on foot, it could take you upwards of 30-45 minutes.  With that said, it's very confusing then to be subjugated to small dungeons with multiple zones within.  Every house in every town is it's own zone, some even have several zones inside.  It makes little to no sense, and takes a player out of the game experience frequently.  Also, picking locks of doors is an automatic zone + trespass (if it's owned)  Which to me doesn't make sense.  Maybe I just want to pick the lock to work on my lock-picking skill, why do I have to zone in, get yelled at, and zone out again just to level my skill?  It gets old.

Part C:  The Game-changers.

2.  Lag and bad programming in general.

I understand a lot is going on in the game and some lag is inevitable.  With that said, there are times (on PS3) the game won't run anymore if you don't understand the rules.  For instance, having a higher bounty in any hold makes the game laggier in that whole area.  Having a high bounty in all areas (for one of the trophies) just about makes the game unplayable.  If you're OCD about looting and selling items you'll not notice a thing, but if you leave shitty stuff where it lies like I do, the game lags more and more as it progresses.  I realize it's a multi-plat game, ported here and there, but the developer has to answer for it.  Any cross-platform game should be identical to it's counterpart, otherwise it's a dis-service to the fans who only have that option.

1.  Perks for LIFE

Skyrim is single player.  Once you buy it, you're in it for yourself and your character.  Skyrim also has a million quests, favors, and world-changing events.  Why is it then that there isn't a quest line for re-specing perks.  Make it a one-time use thing, make it only available till level 30, make them able to be removed for the entire level they were chosen on, make it something.  At the least they could have for-warned the player just how shitty some perks are before they take (waste) them.

Great game, I liked it so much I had to write about it.

-CadDad

Fun With Character Creation

I picked up SoulCalibur V the other day. Compared to SoulCalibur IV, there really hasn't been much of a change in gameplay. Where the fun lies is in the Creation mode, where you can modify and create new fighters.

In SCIV, I made a number of characters from other video games and a few comic book characters. In SCV, I chose to go a different route and am currently working on making a number of fast food icons.

Right now I have three fighters made. First was Ronald McDonald, built off of Astaroth's style and using a giant hammer. Next was Wendy, using the ring blade of Tira. The latest is Colonel Sanders with Raphael's fighting form.

I have The Burger King planned, and was suggested by CadDad to make the Hamburglar and the Noid. I'm thinking I'll need to unlock a few more outfits for those two before I can successfully create them.

What? This isn't difficult enough for you?

After hearing about Demon's Souls from CadDad, plus having read a number of reviews, I was rather interested when I'd heard that they were releasing a sequel that was going multi-platform. Last month, I finally picked up Dark Souls. The first character I made was a pyromancer, a bit of a melee fighter with some magic mixed in. Getting the hang for the controls wasn't much of an issue as the intro tutorial preps you well, and I was moving through it pretty smoothly. Once I got out of the Asylum and into the game proper, this is where I started to encounter problems.

First off, I'd taken a month off between game sessions, so I had to recall the controls. It took a bit to remember them, but it was eventually done without too much hassle. Secondly, there's an NPC that's in the area you start the new area. He provides some good info, but after I talked to him, a message popped up on the ground. Reading the message, it stated "Attack him!" Forgetting one of the unique items from Demon's Souls where other players could leave messages in your world, I believed it was a necessary step.

At least fifteen deaths later, I realized that my attacking this NPC wasn't necessary and that my poor pyromancer would be forever stuck in this cycle of death and resurrection. My new thief is faring much better. I look forward to how much more difficult this game is going to get, especially since I've realized that it's not a good idea to kill those characters that actually take the time to talk to you. Unless they attack first, of course.

5 Things I HATE that video game designers do.

5.  Unnecessary find/fetch/toil/repeat events.

I think we've all played a game that had these.  Find x items and report back; fetch x npc and report back; plant xx trees and grow to maturity to progress; stay alive for 15 minutes without losing your weakest units which also happen to be the most used; repeat planting xx plants for each new 'garden'.  etc.  We've all been there, this is content "addition" in the simplest form, and also major boring shit.  No examples necessary.

4.  "That One Level"

Some games have a level // zone // area // boss // etc, that is far and away the hardest part of the game.  The part that makes you dread another playthrough.   (looking at you Killzone 2 final level)  I also just got a really cool PSN game called Eufloria, but level 11 is impossible compared to the rest of the game, sad because I could spend hundreds of hours playing it.

3.  Game sequels that regress.

Recently I played Uncharted 3, after playing the hell out of both 1 and 2.   I thought for certain that 3 would be a nice culmination of the learning process of both 1 and 2 and I would be rewarded for being a repeat customer.  It ended up (in my opinion) the worst of the set.  Terrible targeting, AI was all rush you, all the time, the story felt "forced", and the quick time events were far and away the most obtrusive of the series, taking me out of the atmosphere repeatedly.

2.  Tired ideas.

Games aren't hollywood movies.  Even in hollywood movies we get tired of the same plots over and over.  Nintendo, I love zelda games, but my goodness, get another princess or something.

1.  Updated roster = new $60.00 game!

Madden................./sadface.

-CadDad

To buy right away, or wait?

More and more games are coming out these days with additional content that can be purchased after the fact. As such, many players who buy their games brand new sometimes feel jilted by the publishing companies by having to drop a decent amount of cash just to get a "complete" game, with some of those items merely being an unlock code to allow the owner the ability to access the added content on the disc.

This isn't entirely a problem, until you look at the fact that many of these games are coming out with an updated version of the game or a Game Of The Year edition that includes all the DLC, all for a reduced price.

Here are a few examples:

1. Borderlands - I paid $9.99 for the GOTY edition. Had I gotten the game itself, it would have cost me $15, then $10 each for the four pieces of DLC.
2. SoulCalibur IV - I got this for the XBox 360 and had Yoda included with it as a MS exclusive. Several months later, I had to pay $5 for an unlock code to get Vader, who until that time was an exclusive on the PS3.
3. Marvel Vs. Capcom 3 - Bought this brand new since I fucking loved the previous two games. Now they're releasing Ultimate Marvel Vs. Capcom 3 just a bare six months after the original was released. New fighters are included, including the DLC from the first.
4. Street Fighter IV - Same as above, but I was at least smart enough to wait for Super Street Fighter IV to come out and got that version.

Honestly, I'm drawn on this. I understand that there is a price to pay for being an early adopter in purchasing a game and playing it at release, especially if this game is an online multiplayer game. But if one is patient, you can get the game and all the content for a cheaper price after the game has been out for a while.

What are your thoughts on this?