Back and forth, bounces the ball...

There's really no describing this game, other than it is three steps shy of sheer perfection in gaming. Let's go back to the year 1972. Nixon won the presidency. Disco reigned supreme. Alyssa Milano was born. And this game shocked and amazed millions. The game was PONG, and it was wonderful.

There appeared the be such simplicity with the game, but little did anyone know that amount of depth within this game. The storyline was amazing, telling a tale of two people in love yet they were prevented from ever meeting as motion was limited to only vertical motion. And they were in fact parallel to each other. Not only physically, but also spiritually, for with their love, they could never meet. And since they could never meet, they knew that to exist without each other was futile. And thus, they must battle. So battle they did, but not in normal ways. No, what they did was they bounced a ball between themselves, trying to get it past each other, all in hopes that it may bring them closer together, but instead it just continued to keep them apart. This went on for all eternity, and yet they still manage to keep on going, never ever meeting and longing for the love that they now know cannot be.

Most people, when playing this most excellent game, totally underestimate the need for control and finesse. Twitch styled gaming need not apply here, for it causes much chaos within the PONG field and thus destroys the beauty of the love story that is PONG. Of course, the chaos does add in the occasional comic relief that is needed in all storylines of games, so maybe the occasional twitch gamer is necessary to make the story of PONG flow well.

Someday, there will be a movie made of PONG. I shall make it, for I will not allow Uwe Boll the chance to do so. And it will be great. Danny DeVito shall play THE BALL. Michael Douglas and Kathleen Turner shall be THE PADDLES. And all three shall be happy, for they are finally reunited for a great cinematic pairing!

In closing, I do love PONG. It is great. And by telling you about this, I hope that you too find a special place in your heart for PONG too.